Saturday, November 26, 2011

And Another Shoe Falls: Snoring Is Your New Reality

Hey angry ladies!
Just returned from a trip to visit family for Thanksgiving and wound up sharing a hotel room with my husband plus my older daughter...the younger one chose to sleep with my mother in another room. She said it was because of my snoring. Well, hello! As if my mother hasn't raised a few roofs in her day! I distinctly recall sleeping in the bathtub when I had the misfortune of sharing a hotel room with both my mother and my aunt in my Golden Youth. Truly one of the most frustrating and sleepless nights of my life.

As for my husband and daughter roomie, he had brought a good supply of earplugs and offered her one of his spare pairs. They slept better than I did. And the second night my husband bravely ditched his plugs and told me I didn't snore. At least not that night. So there.

Yes, it's one of those things like skin tags and crow's feet. If you're not snoring now, you will be. Or maybe you already do and your partner is kind enough to not tell you.

I have also developed an ugly snort when I'm sleeping sitting up in the car or in front of the TV. I wake up to the sound of a farm animal grunting, realize it's me, and then I look hopefully to my husband for reassurance that no one else heard. He gives me a sympathetic smile.

My husband snores sometimes, too. I don't kick him or wake him. I know he'll stop eventually. But somehow snoring is not so ugly on a man. He's expected to be a growling beast at times.

It's just one more way that our dignity and our illusion of feminine beauty is compromised. Women won't generally 'fess up, but their partners will often bring it up in a social setting. Guys like to out us on our snoring.

Is there hope? I understand that losing weight often helps. Gee, isn't that the answer to all our problems? Failing that, there are all kinds of things to buy at the drugstore that claim to stop snoring. I tried one once, but it was icky and it didn't work. Maybe you'll be luckier.

Another indignity we share. The good news is our daughters will join us one day, and their daughters will complain about their snoring, too.

So there.

9 comments:

Anonymous said...

I am angry too...Oh so pissed off! I am approaching the big 60. I have lost interest in everything. I feel as if I want to crawl into a hole and hide and before anyone suggests it NO I am not going to resort to antidepressants. I have finally weaned myself off of these evil (as I see them now) drugs after years of going around like a bit fat zombie. Although at least I didn't think and feel half as much as I do nowadays, what the hell is the answer here? What do I have to look forward to I am always asking myself? More ill health, more deterioration in general, more becoming invisible. The enthusiasm for life seems to have flown straight out of the window. I had so many ambitions, many of which were fulfilled happily. My kids are gone, they have their own lives now, as the saying goes. My grandchildren are beautiful but I have no energy to keep up with them.I crave alcohol, but I am several years into recovery in AA and going back to the drink would kill me. I am financially secure, so no point running around trying to make money. Volunteering? if only I had any energy. I do hope that this morose period of my life is just a passing thing or otherwise it will seem pointless to go on.......

Anonymous said...

Oh babe, and you are .... I am 54 had a bit of botox e.t.c. partner in check, business doing fairly well for the climate, and feel great, look at it this way, why don't we strong women unite, we are by far the smarter, brighter, nicer race and as long as we are not competitive in our own groups can achieve anything, this should give you a little energy..
xx Denise

Anonymous said...

Wow, just found this site - thanks for creating it - a service. I'm angry (52), just got rejected (again)by a former (10 years ago) guy who is 12 years younger than me - yes stupid I know what did I expect - will it ever sink it? Hit the online dating site and for the past 4 men had no reply after I sent my photo - the sad realization that I'm not "cute" enough anymore to even get a date. When,how did this happen? So in a way I envy those of you married, is intimacy over for me? I'm constantly getting overlooked at work after a very long career - even cut off in meetings. It really bothers me that I may never be loved again - is it over rated? what else is there to take it's place? community service? friends? religion wont do it for me. Have to fill this hole - keep looking back on all i hoped for in my twenties, never imagined it could be this crappy. Wish my mother had told me about this.

Anonymous said...

iYou should be checked out at a sleep clinic. The snoring and especially the grunting noise you describe is a symptom of sleep apnea, a deadly, but completely treatable condition. With the aid of a cpap machine, your energy will come back. (though the cpap will add further injury to your self-esteem) Good luck!

Anonymous said...

anti depressants, leave them alone - i blame those things for losing my job cause they made me angry AND stupid. and anyway, iwas depressed because i needed to make a change in my life, which did the trick. i feel i work too much, i'm tired.

Anonymous said...

angry 50 yo woman are you going to blog again?

The Angry 50 Year Old Woman said...

Yes, yes, yes my darling! The Angry 50 Year Old Woman (TA50YOW, perhaps?) is here, reading and publishing all your posts. With so much to be angry about, I find myself feeling more numb than enraged at times. And I must cop to a chronic depression that sends me spiralling periodically. Sometimes what I'm feeling is aimed at someone who might recognize her or himself and I don't have the nerve to commit words to the eternal cyberethernetherworld. And the dog ate...no, no, no.

I'll try to write more often.

Anonymous said...

Hi! About snoring- if you find yourself not getting enough sleep and waking up hazy or with a headache, get a sleep apnea test with your doctor !! I lost a job because I had it, and never got enough sleep to be sharp! Once I strated using a small cheap ventilator that keeps me breathing, I now have no headaches, no leg or back pain, that I got from waking up 20 times a night (and not knowing it) and never getting deep sleep! Mike

Queen B said...

Denise,
I do believe that you just may 'be on to something here...'
and what? no one even mentioned what a great idea this is?
too busy being angry I guess! not that I havent had a few of those horribly, pissey, God-Awful days myself lately...
My 55year old child, oops, 'Husband' decided to go to work and never come home.. Yes, my poor little man wasn't getting enough attention from his wifey (tears).
You see, I spend my time taking care of my extremely ill 20yr old daughter --"Miss A" who out of the blue , came home from school one day with a little bit of a fever-
it was 106* Doc. said "no worries
Queenie' , ' just a touch of a wee little virus..'
10 years and countless, literally countless, teaching hospitals and private medical institutions later... Mayo clinic, Johns hopkins, UCLA and, Cedars Sinai - no one, could figure this out ?

then the big moment.....
out of nowhere SHE REMEMBERS !

I swear, i heard the angels singing

SHE FELL SNOWBOARDING.......

" the base of her skull broke the fall.

Yes, Brain damage, 10 years ago... she didnt remember the fall. Now we know what were dealing with,

you'd think that he could maybe just be grateful for a day or two... before walking out. But noooo ... " ITS time, time that i "put myself first" he says...
put himself first ? really ??
i I will go on about this man... got to keep you wondering what could possible be more selfish than this??
(oh it gets better...)
Botox is exactly what i need right now !!! do tell denise, what was the etc .? I'm sure i need that too!
Your idea to unite is spot on!.
..... no catty witches please.....
all that we need is ,,, DESIRE ! We Can Do Anything...

ta ta for now- Queen B