The most important thing you can ever teach your children is that they must truly Value Themselves. This will permeate everything they are and do and will last their lifetimes.
I watched Oprah last week, and she had a show about children being grabbed off the streets by sexual predators. We've watched the awful videotapes and seen the news stories about these children who never came home. But there were also a couple of stories about children who had fought back and had escaped their would-be captors. Their parents had taken the time to talk about Bad Things That Could Happen. One young girl was pulled from her bicycle and was being dragged to a van, when her parents' warnings came to her and she knew she wanted to Get Back Home. She fought back and was able to escape. I thought then, What can happen to those kids who aren't made to feel that they're worth fighting for?
In less dramatic but also powerful ways, our self-image, determined so long ago, flavors how we perform at every stage in our lives
Children who haven't been taught to value themselves don't push themselves to the front at school and so get passed over, while other more confident children capture the teachers' interest and get more attention and a better education.
Those children grow up to be people who don't hit the top in their careers because they secretly don't believe they deserve the success.
They don't lose the weight because they sabotage their own diets. They don't get healthy because they really don't think they have the right.
A few years ago, there was a construction site right outside the entrance to the building I worked in. There was a layer of fine silt over a granite sidewalk. Scurrying out for a lunch hour errand, I slipped and fell flat on my front on the sidewalk. Not one construction worker came to my aid, but several fellow office workers helped me up and inquired about my condition. It was a pretty spectacular fall. Of course, the first instinct is to pretend like you meant to start doing push-ups in the middle of lunch hour foot traffic, but I just thanked my benefactors, brushed myself off and kept moving. I really hurt myself, and paid for many sessions of accupuncture before I could move my left arm in an upward position. I still can't lay on that side for long in bed. I look back and think, Why in the world didn't I demand to see the Head Guy and fill out an accident report?
They should at least have paid for my treatments, if not put my kid through college or replaced Chitty-Chitty Bang Bang in the driveway. How many other people would have gone that route? The ones who felt their bodies were worth more?
The American people have undervalued themselves for the last several years - since, say November 2000 - by putting up with being a low priority of Bush and his Republican Party. Those who questioned this were labelled unpatriotic.
But it seems that now we are demanding more - and Bush is listening. His approval rating is so low he has to listen. Maybe at some point he'll actually figure out that we deserve to be listened to and what we say must be acted upon -- not just to pull up his ratings, but because it's our right and his duty.
We have to Value Ourselves in order to Be Valued.
Each One Of Us.
4 comments:
I don't know if we undervalue ourselves because of the Bush administration, but I do wonder why all the lies and bull go on. Why do the people of this country and this world put up with the politicians? To me it seems like most are insincere. I know that most people would not tell the truth of their convictions if they want a place in office. But come on! There are new generations of voters now! Children of the seventies, eighties and nineties! We are ready! We want passion in our government. We want zeal and love, respect for all the living beings of the world. Too idealistic? Gosh I don't know, I really hope not.
I found your blog by accident. I was looking for ways to improve the condition of my hair. I'll be fifty in 2 months. My hair is dry, brittle, and unmanageable. Click, click, I found your blog. I must say, I don't feel angry about too many things but I am passionate about certain things. I believe I was a "really angry 40 year old women." My 40's seemed to be an awakening! 40's seemed to be the new 50's or 60's in my neck of the woods. We moved around alot. Chasing careers, better pay, better benefits, results...more challenges. I worked at a full-time job ,2 part-time jobs and raise three children. Put myself through school and received by degree. My two oldest children still blame us for leaving their friends, their neighborhoods, their schools each time. We are settled now, but now I don't want to work anymore. I am so burned out. I don't watch Oprah, soap operas, or game shows. I want silence. I don't have clients telling me what they want, or anyone invading my privacy. Sometimes women just want to be left alone. I did all the socializing during my first 50 years. Enough! I don't want to volunteer, I don't need to be included, what I do want is to exercise my rights to choose our government officials. This is my goal for the next 20 years. I believe I have done my duty to pay taxes, raise my children as good abiding citizens, as well as, set an example for my daughter as a strong, successful woman. Now, it is time to focus on what I want for my children and my grand children's future. I am a woman on a quest! If there are new generations of voters now, they ain't seen nothing yet! This almost 50 year old woman is on a mission. This is the time for all of us to pay close attention as to who is sincere and who is not. We have earned the respect and consideration of all. As baby boomers, we are the majority. We need to voice our opinion on healthcare, retirement, taxes, education, Homeland security, and spending by our government. We also need jobs better suited for women our age. We shouldn't be forced to compete for jobs side by side with 20 or 30 year old. The age discrimination law is very hard to prove. If someone out there has a list on how to compete with younger people for the same job, I am listening. Also, if someone can tell me how I can have the same energy to do the same job for 8-10 hours a day without taking a nap let me know. I look forward to any responses.
I found your blog by accident. I was looking for ways to improve the condition of my hair. I'll be fifty in 2 months. My hair is dry, brittle, and unmanageable. Click, click, I found your blog. I must say, I don't feel angry about too many things but I am passionate about certain things. I believe I was a "really angry 40 year old women." My 40's seemed to be an awakening! 40's seemed to be the new 50's or 60's in my neck of the woods. We moved around alot. Chasing careers, better pay, better benefits, results...more challenges. I worked at a full-time job ,2 part-time jobs and raise three children. Put myself through school and received by degree. My two oldest children still blame us for leaving their friends, their neighborhoods, their schools each time. We are settled now, but now I don't want to work anymore. I am so burned out. I don't watch Oprah, soap operas, or game shows. I want silence. I don't have clients telling me what they want, or anyone invading my privacy. Sometimes women just want to be left alone. I did all the socializing during my first 50 years. Enough! I don't want to volunteer, I don't need to be included, what I do want is to exercise my rights to choose our government officials. This is my goal for the next 20 years. I believe I have done my duty to pay taxes, raise my children as good abiding citizens, as well as, set an example for my daughter as a strong, successful woman. Now, it is time to focus on what I want for my children and my grand children's future. I am a woman on a quest! If there are new generations of voters now, they ain't seen nothing yet! This almost 50 year old woman is on a mission. This is the time for all of us to pay close attention as to who is sincere and who is not. We have earned the respect and consideration of all. As baby boomers, we are the majority. We need to voice our opinion on healthcare, retirement, taxes, education, Homeland security, and spending by our government. We also need jobs better suited for women our age. We shouldn't be forced to compete for jobs side by side with 20 or 30 year old. The age discrimination law is very hard to prove. If someone out there has a list on how to compete with younger people for the same job, I am listening. Also, if someone can tell me how I can have the same energy to do the same job for 8-10 hours a day without taking a nap let me know. I look forward to any responses.
I agree with you, you should always teach your kids they should value themselves and others also. They should also NEVER underestimate themselves, many times kids generally underestimates them, and they do not grow well in their career.
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